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shima-draws · 5 years ago

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Shima Shima Shima please tell us all about your Wonderland AU for Tododeku!!!

Oohhh! Ooohh I would love to okay let’s see

Honestly it would probably just be easier for me to explain the original movie’s plot rather than just. Trying to make sense of what you don’t know with Izuku and everybody else’s involvement so.

Note that all of this is purely from memory having seen the movie once like, a couple weeks ago in theaters LMAO so there’s definitely gonna be some things I’m hazy on. But! The movie’s online now so after I watch it again I’ll update this post with a better summary!

Under the cut for MAJOR spoilers and also bc it got really long!

So! The Wonderland! It’s about a girl named Akane who isn’t terribly self-assured. She has friends and has a good life but she’s sort of…timid, so she doesn’t put herself out there when she should. This causes issues within her group of friends and even with her own mother, who Akane is sort of distanced from.

The day before her birthday, Akane’s mother sends her to meet up with her older friend Chii to receive a birthday gift. Akane does NOT want to go because Chii’s very…overbearing, and excited, and very very outgoing, completely opposite to her. Chii travels all around the world gathering antiques for her shop (mostly light fixtures tho) and is a pro at haggling trades and prices. Akane calls her a witch bc she rips people off sometimes lmao

Akane arrives at the shop and finds a strange slab with an indented handprint. Akane fits her hand into the indent and finds that it fits perfectly!! This causes a reaction which calls upon a resident from Wonderland, an alchemist named Hippocrates, to arrive from Chii’s basement (which is basically just a little storage hole). Chii immediately gets a broom and starts hitting him with it, calling him a creep and an intruder LMAO

Hippocrates explains that Akane is the Goddess of the Green Wind, and that Wonderland needs her help. Next to Akane, on the table, a little doll springs to life, who’s revealed to be a tiny little chibi character named Pipo who works as Hippocrates’ apprentice. (He’d been hiding there all morning, I guess to scope out the person whose hand would fit into the indentation.) Akane’s hand is still stuck in the little slab by the way and she keeps freaking out. She says she absolutely does not want to go to Wonderland to help them, so Hippocrates gifts her with an item called the momentum anchor. Essentially it’s an item that forces a person to keep moving forward and looking ahead when they try to go back. (Basically it’s an item that forces character development which is pretty wild lol) After Akane gets her hand free, the momentum anchor forces her to accompany Hippocrates and Pipo to Wonderland. Chii decides fuck it she’s going on a magical adventure too, and tags along with them!

When they arrive in Wonderland, they end up at the top of a large sort of watchtower/nest for a huge ass bird. Chii befriends the bird, who is protecting her eggs. As they make their way to the nearest town, they run into a man and his mother, whose ride/carriage cart thing was destroyed by an enormous machine that Hippocrates calls the “armored mouse” (because it kinda looks like a mouse). The armored mouse attacks the cart and essentially swallows it, including the sweater that the old lady had made. Inside the armored mouse, the Main Antagonist ™ of Wonderland greets the newcomers. His name is Zan Gu, and he’s intimidating as all hell. He’s not openly cruel, just quiet, and isn’t afraid to assert his villainly dominance. Most of his face is hidden, but he seems to have a skeletal, sort of robotic body. His cohort, a little cat person named Doropo, teases them. Doropo’s basically a mischievous troublemaker who enjoys making fun of others and getting in people’s way.

Zan Gu and Doropo continue on in the machine, and they head straight for the watchtower. The armored mouse starts to tear up the iron staircase, disrupting the tower. Chii rushes over and manages to save one of the bird’s eggs. Hippocrates calls upon the sheep from the nearby town to come help (and they’re HUGE and FLUFFY and adorable). The sheep crowd in on the armored mouse, and Zan Gu is forced to retreat.

The man who they had saved introduces himself as the mayor of the nearest town. The group walks over to the town, surrounded by hundreds of sheep. Hippocrates explains on the way that the land is dying because there’s a lack of water, which is one of the reasons why he brought Akane there. Akane’s like “How the hell am I supposed to help you get your water back”. They pass a gorgeous flower field which slowly gets worse and more dried out.

The villagers are relieved to see Hippocrates there, who is pretty famous in this world bc of his status as an alchemist. They also jump on Akane, super excited that the Green Goddess of the Wind is here to help them! Night falls and Akane freaks out, because she’d obviously wanted to go home like hours ago, and her mother is probably worried. Chii, on the other hand, is super nonchalant about everything that just happened, and is like “Well we’re already here and it’s late so we should stay, it’ll be fine!”

The group has dinner with the mayor while his mother starts to knit a new sweater to replace the one she lost to Zan Gu. Here we get a bit more into Wonderland’s history–the mayor explains that the flowers and sheep are what they use to make these sweaters and other clothing, but they aren’t selling as well as they used to anymore bc of the water crisis. He’d originally been on his way to a place called Sakasatongara Market with his mother to enter her sweater into a contest. Hippocrates takes over and discusses the water crisis in more detail. The original Green Goddess of the Wind had come over 600 years ago, and had saved Wonderland when they were in a similar crisis. Apparently, there’s a ceremony that is performed every year called the drop mist ceremony, which properly distributes water to the whole land. This ceremony is supposed to be performed by the prince, who supposedly has a lot of magical power, coming from a generation of royalty who can control water. According to Hippocrates the prince has been gravely ill over the past year, and this is because his parents had died, leaving him to grieve and become very sick as a result. Hippocrates believes that Akane, being the new Goddess, has the power to heal the prince and allow him to perform the ceremony. Akane again denies that she has any sort of power like that. During all this Chii keeps pointing out contradicitons in Hippocrates’ story and it’s hilarious because it makes him very angry and flustered LMAO and Akane’s like “Chii-chan, you’re being super rude right now”. I can’t remember if it’s here or not, but Akane sees a picture on the wall of the previous Green Goddess, and she looks really familiar…kind of like her mother…?

The next day, the group of four (Hippocrates, Pipo, Akane and Chii) decide they’re going to travel to Sakasatongara Market in order to deliver the mayor’s mother’s sweater to be entered into the contest. The market is on the way to Timeless Rain Castle, where the prince resides. The sweater is placed into Akane’s care, who promises she will deliver it. They’re given a car, which will help greatly with the journey, and then they set off!

Akane and Chii admire the scenery of Wonderland as they travel, but are saddened when they begin to see areas that have a clear lack of water and have died out from neglect. Meanwhile, in a grungy, dark city, Zan Gu approaches a man and brings him more metal. Apparently the armored mouse had been going around collecting metal, which we find out later that it’s so the armored mouse can be upgraded and reinforced even more to wreak more havoc (along with one other essential upgrade, which I’ll get to later). The man says he needs more metal if he wants to make something out of what they have. Zan Gu does his whole “threaten the victim” schtick, and guarantees he’ll bring more, as long as the job gets done. (I might be remembering these sections out of order but it all happens within the same timeframe, more or less.)

Back to Akane and co., they’re driving in the desert and they head right into the biggest fucking dust storm in the world. They take shelter under a large rock, hiding out there until the storm blows over. They were given huge fluffy suits (bascially fursuits) that were made from the sheep. They’re pink and comfy but horribly embarrassing for Hippocrates in particular to wear LMAO but they’re a great shelter for the storm. After the storm subsides, Hippocrates attempts to fix the car, but finds it’s getting late and that they’ll have to wait until the morning to do so. In the middle of the night, Akane wakes up to see Chii standing outside, looking at the stars. It’s absolutely gorgeous and beautiful.

The next morning, Hippocrates fixes the car! Hooray! With that they drive further north and arrive in a very snowy little village. Akane hears more stories about how things were when water was plentiful, and they’re exposed firsthand to how the shortage has caused people to become greedy. Zan Gu shows up while Hippocrates is out refueling and Doropo threatens the inn owner into giving up food and water. Zan Gu has an intense staredown with Akane but doesn’t do anything more before leaving.

Hippocrates sees the armored mouse on the move and follows them. At this point the mouse has been upgraded and looks more terrifying than ever, and can bulldoze and tear things apart much easier. Zan Gu goes to receive new materials, which are revealed to be missiles for a cannon. Hippocrates intervenes, but Doropo uses his magic to turn the alchemist into a fly.

Akane and Chii worry about Hippocrates’ whereabouts, but with some prodding, decide to head to Sakasatongara Market without him since they’re on a bit of a time crunch, seeing as the drop mist ceremony has to be performed the next day. They pass by Hippocrates’ house (but Pipo informs them nobody is there) and Pipo’s childhood home in the trees, where tons of other little chibi sprites hang about. The girls travel through a steep mountain range as Hippocrates tries to guide them–but being a fly, he keeps getting ignored and brushed off, even by Pipo, who can’t tell it’s him. Eventually they have to drive over a rickety wooden bridge, and Chii teases Akane about her nonexistent love life at school in an attempt to keep things lighthearted and distract them from the terrifying ride over the bridge. Akane pokes back and makes fun of Chii for her failed conquests of men. One of the planks breaks and Chii steps on it, and they’re both screaming as they cross the rest of the bridge LOL

At some point during all this we cut to Timeless Rain Castle, where everyone is preparing for the drop mist ceremony. The prince’s closest advisers decide to go up and visit, and it’s revealed that the prince isn’t ill at all–he’s trapped within a little metal doll’s body, a curse placed upon him by Hippocrates’ “rival”. (He’s a good guy tho too, apparently.) This rival has been asleep for a long time, and is nearly impossible to wake because of how hectic his magic is. (We later see a scene in which several guards attempt to rouse him. His house is literally sitting on the edge of a cliff on one corner, the rest of it floating in the air, and he’s sleeping. No wonder they’re cautious about waking him up LMAO) Because this other magical user has been asleep, the prince has been trapped in this form for nearly a year. They scramble to find out a way to revert him to normal before the ceremony the next day.

After that it seems to be easy going for the girls. Pipo warns them nanoseconds before they drive off another bridge–and land in a giant lily pad! They’re on a huge pond now, with koi fish the size of whales. Pipo douses himself with magic dew that lets him breathe underwater and makes sure his clothes don’t get wet. Chii happily jumps in after, and Akane, after hesitating, also joins them. They ride the giant fish, who push the lily pad with their car across the pond. Akane picks up some sea shells at the bottom of the pond and puts them in her pocket to save for later.

Akane, Chii, and Pipo (and Hippocrates, still a fly) finally arrive at Sakasatongara Market!! First they have to go through customs, in which they’re judged by a group of talking cats (which Chii finds HILARIOUS). Akane is declared as a guilty party bc a few days before, she’d pulled her cat’s tail for sitting on her face. Her cat is revealed to be the leader of the group. She’s briefly given a cat tail herself, which is pulled on, so she understands how much it hurts LOL while Chii teases the rest with catnip and treats. They’re allowed entrance into the city. From the distance, they can see the prince arriving as well, presumably in the royal carriage. They have no idea he’s still in doll form.

In the prince’s tent, Hippocrates’ rival finally arrives. (Guess they managed to wake him up lol) The others beg for him to turn the prince back to normal. The wizard points out that the doll they’ve been guarding so carefully all this time is, in fact, not the prince at all. He uses his magic to transform it–revealing that it had just been a stuffed toy, acting as a decoy. Everyone panics, wondering where the actual prince has gone.

Akane and Chii gaze on as Pipo points out the well where the drop mist ceremony takes place. Sitting in the center of the city (which is p much set up like a giant stadium, with steps leading down to the middle), the well is a huge symbol of peace for the land! And it’s a central part of the ceremony, as well. Chii rushes off to bargain and barter while Akane and Pipo go to enter the old lady’s sweater into the contest.

As they’re walking around, they catch sight of Doropo, who just stole goods from a nearby shop. Pipo orders Akane to chase after him, which she does. As they follow him to the outskirts of the city, Pipo realizes that Doropo might be one of his friends from school, another chibi sprite named Ron. Ron had gone on to apprentice with the wizard, and Pipo with Hippocrates, so Ron had always viewed them as rivals.

On the outskirts of the city, Akane and Pipo see that the armored mouse is there. Moved by her own determination, Akane sneaks into the machine to see what Doropo and Zan Gu’s plans are. Hippocrates follows them in.

They catch a conversation between Doropo and Zan Gu. Zan Gu seems to be getting increasingly frustrated and hasty, and Doropo keeps blowing him off. Zan Gu eventually snaps at him, and the truth comes out. Apparently they plan to destroy the well before the ceremony can take place. If this happens, no water will come to Wonderland ever again, essentially dooming everybody. Zan Gu had gathered the missiles and upgraded the machine with a cannon to achieve this. Zan Gu blames Doropo for everything that happened to him, saying that while Doropo is obviously hesitating, he had been the one to transform him into a monster in the first place. Doropo sadly admits that he just didn’t want the prince to hate him…and this is the part that hit me HARD because we realize that Zan Gu has been the prince this whole time!! We get a flashback to when the prince was actually trapped inside the doll. He angrily says to Ron that if he could allow him to speak, he could turn him back, right? Ron makes an attempt, but he’s not that experienced with magic, so it ends up in a total disaster, transforming the prince into a basic corpse.

It’s at this point where things are set into motion. Akane eventually reveals herself. Pipo calls out Doropo on his disguise, and he transforms back into Ron. Zan Gu prepares to bust through the city walls and destroy the well. The wizard releases all of the magic Doropo had caused, making Hippocrates transform back into his regular self. Zan Gu busts into the city, and Hippocrates tries to stop him. Right as he’s lining up to take the shot at the well, Akane grabs onto him and starts her Grand Heroine Speech. She points out that Zan Gu–the prince–was scared, and that’s why he was doing this, because he was trying to run away from his responsibility. The prince explains his story in detail.

The drop mist ceremony, being a very important one among their family for generations, had been successfully performed by his father and grandfather. However, pressure from his parents, peers and all of Wonderland was too much for the prince to handle, so he started to reject any practices of the ceremony. After his parents passed, that pressure became even worse, because he was the only one left able to perform the ceremony properly. He got angry and scared and started to push everyone away and lash out at those who tried to help. Eventually it got so bad that the wizard had to come in and use his magic to transform the prince into the metal doll, essentially trapping him there as punishment and as a way to reflect on his mistakes. This obviously angered the prince, being trapped in a body that couldn’t move or speak, which eventually led to Ron’s involvement and his transformation. The prince wants to destroy it all, either out of revenge or maybe because he just has little to no empathy in this form and is only full of negative emotions, who can say…

Akane goes on to encourage him again despite all this, and tells him he’s not alone, that she promises she’ll be there to help him. She tells him how inspired she’s become traveling through Wonderland, getting to meet all of the wonderful people, and seeing how beautiful it is. She says she wants to save it, and that she wants to help the prince. Her words, and her change, break the curse on the prince, transforming him back into his adorable princely self. The prince agrees to perform the ceremony. Chii meets up with the group and apologizes to Akane for leaving her alone to deal with everything. Akane asks Hippocrates if they can make another momentum anchor for the prince, because the one she has helped her a lot along her journey and pushed her in the right direction, and she feels like that’s what the prince needs, too. Akane promises to return the next morning before the ceremony to be there for the prince.

Hippocrates, Akane, Chii and Pipo travel back to the alchemist’s house. Together they spend the night making a new momentum anchor, which requires a lot of magic. Akane gives it her all to help! They successfully make a new one, and hurry back to Sakasatongara Market. It’s morning now. Akane rushes to greet the prince, and gifts him with the anchor. She says that they match now, both having anchors. (The prince gets all soft and blushy and it’s very cute.) The prince talks with his adviser, who warns him what will happen if the ceremony fails. The prince knows it’s a huge price to pay, but says he’s ready to do it.

Akane is dressed up in Green Goddess robes, similar to the ones her mother wore. She and the prince cross the bridge which hangs over the well, which is so deep that you can’t even see the bottom. With Akane’s encouragement, the prince performs the ceremony. Nothing happens. The prince knows what has to be done–he strides up to the edge and prepares to throw himself in. Akane understandably freaks out and tries to stop him. The prince explains that if the ceremony fails the performer has to offer their body as a sacrifice to make water flow again. Akane’s like I’m NOT letting you do that, and the two of them start to struggle. The prince manages to make it to the edge–and Akane topples over with him. Both of them fall into the well.

Before they hit the bottom and inevitably die, they’re saved by the wizard. He explains that it was basically a sort of test–the prince had to show he was willing enough to make a sacrifice that big. He says that Akane is special, and that the prince should thank her properly for all her help. They’re sent back up to the bridge! The ceremony begins, and the prince rushes to get into position. The well erupts with water, straight up into the sky, an enormous geyser for all the world to see. The prince takes out his sword and starts to slice the water with it, which turns them into water birds. The water birds fly all over Wonderland and rain down on the land, restoring its vitality. He turns to face Akane to see that she is crying in joy, as is Chii.

After the ceremony ends, Akane and Chii go with Hippocrates and Pipo to return to their world. Akane frets over how much time has passed since they left. Hippocrates explains that, while three days have passed in Wonderland, only three hours have passed in their world. Akane and Chii realize that if they were ever to return, everyone they met probably wouldn’t be there anymore. Apparently the original slab with the hand print Akane’s mother had made was repaired–and Akane stumbles right into the wet plaster, printing her hand there for the next generation. She attempts to give the momentum anchor back to Hippocrates, but he tells her that it had vanished a long time ago, and that Akane had been moving forward by her own momentum and decisions. Akane and Chii kiss Pipo goodbye, and they say their farewells. Hippocrates gifts Akane with a little textile with a sword on it. They head back…and emerge from the basement of Chii’s shop. When they look back at it again, it’s just the storage compartment, and nothing else. Their adventure is over.

Chii goes to take a long nap. Akane rushes home to see her mother. By now she’s made the connection that her mother was the original Green Goddess of the Wind, who saved Wonderland over 25 years ago. Her mother notices the textile and compares it to the same one Akane has in her room. Akane thinks that she feels a lot closer to her mother now. And that’s where the movie ends!

Ofc there’s tons of extra stuff that I missed LMAO but that is the basic plot of the whole thing. Now, as for the AU…Izuku is Akane, obviously, but instead of having her reluctance to go on an adventure, he’s willing, but doesn’t think he’s worthy of being a hero to anyone, and is constantly stopped because of his own fear.

Ochako is Chii–she fits perfectly with her personality lol. Iida is Hippocrates, both being super punctual and easy to fluster. Kirishima is Pipo, and Bakugou is Ron/Doropo–good fits with their characters, and also. Kiribaku moments? *eyes emoji* Todoroki is obviously the prince/Zan Gu! In the AU I’m probably going to extend things a bit further, so Izuku and Ochako stay in Wonderland a bit longer, and Todoroki falls in love with Izuku >:’D As for the smaller roles, I haven’t really decided those yet. Toshi is probably going to be the mayor, and Nana as the old lady. I’ve gotta rewatch the movie again to help me decide on the rest :’D

Buuut yeah! I’m gonna take a lot of liberties with the AU and expand on the movie waaay more, and try to fill in all the plot holes. A lot of the narration felt really abrupt so I’m gonna have fun weaving it all together so it flows! And tons of Tododeku moments because uh YEAH

That’s all for now!! If you’ve got more questions hmu, I’m super down to chat about this more!

#Shima answers questions #The Wonderland #Birthday Wonderland #The Wonderland spoilers #Tododeku #BNHA #Boku no Hero Academia #My Hero Academia #MHA #The Wonderland AU #Shima's AUs #Izuku Midoriya #Shouto Todoroki #Katsuki Bakugou #Eijirou Kirishima #Tenya Iida #Ochako Uraraka #Long post #I'M SORRY IT'S LIKE SUUUPER LONG AMDKASMDALDS

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sauzwriting · 4 years ago

Text

dark before the dawn

Dimitri won't get a break from his nightmares. Fear and guilt haunt him during the night. He hasn't slept in days.

But Dedue is back now. He understands him better than anyone, so he won't let the prince wither in the dark of his mind.

Pairing: Dimitri/Dedue

Tags: emotional hurt/comfort, self-hatred, healing, light angst

Warnings: blue lions spoilers

ao3

In dark halls, cold stone walls had been painted red.

Already used to the darkness, Dimitri's eyes were locked on the person standing next to him. Not too far behind, the metallic echoes of armor reached their ears, screams tearing at angry, desperate throats. He could hear the footsteps approaching them, somehow following the rhythm of his own nervous and rapid heart beating.

Dedue walked towards the sound, firmly holding an axe in his battered hands. Barely holding up— panting heavily, Dimitri slowly turned around, so he could look at his companion, tell him to run away with him. He now was, after all, the only glimmer of hope in his so-called life. Maybe if they escaped together, maybe the voices echoing in his mind would go quiet.

The metallic clashing of weapons hit Dimitri's ears harshly and very closely, sparks flying through the air. Weakly, his thoughts vanished as he slowly blinked, fighting his weary state. He saw Dedue in front of him, repelling swift attacks of many soldiers. Swords flying at him, shining in the dusk, sinking into dark skin. Dedue's blood, running through the blinding silver of imperial blades. It was now his friend's blood the one painting the cold stone walls.

All of his strenght seemed to come back in a sudden rush. The blond prince held his lance, raised it up and ran towards his enemies. He opened his mouth and let out an almost inhuman shriek, filled with anger and pain. Time seemed to slow down around Dimitri as he slashed through the imperials, his lance completely stained red and his thundering voice clawing at the hearts of his enemies, resonating throughout the dungeon halls.

His vision had gone blurry and dizzy, tinted red.

Once he came back to reality, he was breathless, standing over a pile of lifeless bodies, bloodied and indistinguishable. Looking at the floor, he heard footsteps slowly approaching him and sighed. Dimitri opened his mouth to speak, throat hurting. Yet, it was not his own voice the one he heard.

“Your Highness!”

It all happened in barely a second. Dimitri, shaken, looked up to see a trembling soldier swinging his blade at him. The rush was over, however, and his body was back to being weary and tired, heavy on his lance, supporting him where he stood. The prince couldn't find the strenght to move, nor was his body responding.

Blood splashing beneath feet, it was just in an instant that Dedue ran to his aid, fiercely stopping the blow with his own body. In just an instant, blade and axe crossed their paths, finding a way into vulnerable skin, plunging into its warmth, sinking deeply; blood flowing.

The imperial soldier, already badly injured, fell to the floor. But so did Dedue.

Dimitri desperately let go of his lance and ran to Dedue. Staining his cold, trembling hands with warm blood, he held his body in his arms. The sword had cut through his chest.

He had hoped to hear some last words, a whisper: anything, to prove he still breathed. But the hallway fell silent as the warmth of Dedue's body gradually faded.

“It is their fate” A ghost whispered into his ear, cunningly.

Icy cold caressed his cheeks, covered with washed up blood.

“To die for you.”

“For you to avenge us.”

“It is the price you must pay to live.”

Words echoed in his mind and crawled into his heart, nesting into the deepest part of his being.

It had been their home all along, after all.

* * *

Dimitri woke up in a cold sweat, almost breathless.

He blinked, realizing where he was. His body was cold, lying on soft sheets, a familiar bed bathed under the gentle moonlight. Trembling hands reached for his wet cheeks, wiping away tears he didn't know he'd cried.

Despite all these years, despite everything that had happened, this room had remained almost identical. It knew nothing of the passage of time, knew nothing of how twisted the heart of the one who used to live there had finally become.

Breathing in and out, Dimitri closed his eye, trying to calm his heart and himself. Trying to forget the images that invaded his mind, ready to come back unnanounced. He tried to bask in the silence, for once.

He knew, however, it wouldn't work. He disliked being alone. Mostly, because during all these years, he never truly felt like he was alone. Haunted by ghosts, haunted by his guilt. Haunted by death itself. Dimitri could barely remember how standing still, in silence, enjoying solitude, actually felt.

He didn't want to be alone.

But after everything he had done, even all those things he couldn't recall; memories corrupted by blood and empty words of revenge, the prince didn't believe he was worthy of sympathy or affection.

So, unable to escape his own quivering thoughts and unable to lull himself back to sleep, afraid of what his own mind would put him through, Dimitri decided to go alone for a walk at night.

Bare feet gently slipped through the silent floor of the monastery, drifting down ancient stairs. Dimitri went out to the courtyard, fresh air running through his messy hair, rustling through dark leaves, disrupting the placid silence of the night. It was cold outside, but the prince didn't seem to care.

Looking up at the sky, he met the stars once again. Just like his old room, they remained unchanged. The sky remained ethereal and timeless, always looking down on them, witness to so much madness and tragedy. The same sky, the same white clouds he used to watch, calmly dancing on a blue canvas, projecting kind shadows over his face.

They were still here, kinder as ever.

Back in those days, they all looked up to the same sight, completely oblivious of what their future would bring. He wondered, for a moment, if his old classmates still looked up at the old stars and clouds, their eyes glimmering with a different light now. The prince smiled bitterly at the thought.

“Your Highness?”

A deep but gentle voice spoke, startling Dimitri. Turning back to the familiar sound, he met Dedue's worried face. He thought his heart had stopped for a moment, vision blurrying and fading to black, images from his wretched mind creeping into reality. Dedue's voice was soft, caring, genuine. Breathing into the cold of the night, travelling through the chilly air. He was right there, in front of him. Teal eyes and snowy hair, dimly glowing under the moonlight.

And yet, Dimitri could barely believe the man standing before him was not a ghost, joining the others, fated to live inside his shadow.

“It is late and cold,” Dedue looked at the sky while he spoke, words lingering on his mouth as he slowly turned to Dimitri “is everything alright?”

“I—“ The prince stuttered over his own words. “I apologize. Do not worry about me, Dedue. I was—I was just taking a walk, since I couldn't fall asleep.”

Dimitri tried, he tried so hard to keep his voice steady, but words came out weakly and shaky, his lips twitching. “How are you faring, Dedue? It has...” his voice cracked. “War has not been kind to any of us.”

“I could not sleep either. ” Dedue's voice still felt so unreal. “It has...not been easy, Your Highness. I won't lie.”

After Rodrigue's death, Dimitri had crumbled down. Guilt washing over him and stopping him right in his tracks. He didn't take care of his own life over the last five years and now; now, he felt unworthy of holding onto it. The prince had bathed in loneliness for far too long, after so many abandoned him to join the haunting choir in his nightmares.

But Dedue was here now: he'd come back to him, back from the dead. He gazed at what Dimitri had become, and the prince felt ashamed of his own existence, ashamed that such kind eyes looked at him; scrapped, broken, savage. Dimitri could barely look back. He would see the scars he got from protecting him, the scars that stained dark skin, just like blood had stained kind, caring hands.

It was his fault.

“It has been hard watching you,” Dedue gently whispered. “Suffering from a weight that should have never been yours to bear.”

Dimitri frowned in frustration as festered hatred stabbed his heart. He looked down, a dark shadow hovering over a melancholic grin.

“I do not deserve such words, Dedue.”

“I hurt you. I made you fight for me. For a beast like me.” He spit out his words, bitterly.

Dedue's eyes were now on him. But Dimitri couldn't muster the strenght to face him. Not like this.

“I chose to fight,” Dedue's voice was firm, “and I would do it again, if it meant keeping you from harm.”

“I...I am not worth fighting for,” Dimitri could just let out a weak laugh. “I am but a fool who toyed with others' lives. I spoke of revenge but I—I'm the first one that murders the ones I love. Making—Making them fight for me, for my foolish cause, for my recklessness.” The wind shook the leaves over their heads, the prince's disheveled hair flowing in the air. “I am but a monster who takes from others.”

Silence fell between the two as Dimitri slowly started to regret the words that came out of his mouth. He bit his lip and swallowed.

“Dedue, I'm sorr—“

“Dimitri.”

A loud heart beat resonated inside Dimitri's chest and, suddenly, a warm hand softly caressed his cheek.

“Please, look at me.”

Dimitri breathed in and looked back at last, feeling his own eyes growing watery once his quivering gaze met Dedue's tranquil eyes. Swimming deep into pale green, he saw tenderness, care and worry.

How could someone look at him like that? Dimitri felt the urge to look away, knowing there was possibly no way he deserved such treatment, and yet he found himself unable to muster the strenght to look away from such sincere gaze.

“You are nothing of the sort.” Dedue moved his hand away from Dimitri's face, realizing the meaning of his own action and took a deep breath. “I only wish I could have found you sooner. I...” He swallowed. “I wish I could have been there for you. So many moons...spent alone, wondering if you were even alive.” His voice trembled a bit and so did his lips. “You are a kind man, Dimitri. I am sure of that. Your heart has always proven it to me.”

Dedue's voice echoed through Dimitri's head. Right in front of him, facing him, with a gentle face and a warm soul, was the man who had always been by his side. Speaking compassionate words, as he'd always done. Speaking his name, in soft and caring whispers, giving him his humanity back with just mere words. Something he had always wished, something he now dared not to desire.

Dedue's heart had not changed in the past five years. And yet Dimitri was afraid that nothing of this could be real. His eyes, invaded by visions dirty with blood and death, his own pitiful screams, clawing at his mind. Vivid memories of crimson fingers holding cold, dead hands.

Guilt.

“I—“ Dimitri tried to speak but he choked on his own voice, holding back a sob as silent tears rolled down his face, tasting salty on his dry lips. He tried to hide his face behind his hands, cold and calloused. “I abandoned you, Dedue. I—I lived, all these years...thinking you'd died. Knowing it had been my fault.” The prince hid his mouth, biting his lips so he would stop shedding more tears.

He felt pathetic.

“Every single night, I—I saw you die in my dreams. It had turned into a memory. So now...those words, your voice, your eyes, how you speak of me; it looks closer to a dream than what I had grown used to. It...feels so feeble,” his voice was now turning into a weak whisper, his vision going blurry, his head dizzy, “I want these nightmares to end. I want you to be here. Please, tell me you are real. Please, tell me I didn't kill you. Please...I—I can't lose anyone again. I can't lose you.”

Shame bubbled up on the prince's heart as his mind started to give in to the effects of many sleepless nights and a wounded body. His voice died down on his lips and his legs went weak, the world seemed to go black as it started spinning around him. Dimitri blinked repeteadly, trying to keep his balance, seeing his warm breath floating through the air.

The headache that had been pursuing him for weeks grew unbearable, every single noise of the apparent silent night thundering into his ears, echoing in his skull. Even his own voice, a miserable sound, echoed along the rest of them.

Suddenly, two strong hands were holding him, keeping him up, despite all the trembling.

“Your Highness...you're shivering.” Suddenly, one of those hands gently touched his cheek, caressing his face carefully, reaching his forehead. “You're burning...”

“Your Highness?”

All weight left the prince's body and, finally, the silence washed away all the turmoil rampaging in his head.

“...Dimitri?”

***

His eye hurt when he tried to open it.

Still feeling a heavy weight on his chest and head, ghostly tears covering his pale skin, Dimitri finally woke up.

As he weakly gazed to the ceiling, he realized he was back into his quarters. A sharp pain struck his head when he tried to sit up in the darkness of the room, bleak silence visting him, just like every other night.

This time, however, he wasn't alone.

“How are you feeling?” A voice broke through the suffocating air that clouded the prince's mind.

Faint light, intruding the room from the window, fell on Dedue, softening his figure and face. Resting by his bed, he was sitting in a rather uncomfortable chair, wearing a serene expression on his face, one that seemed to soothe the prince's heart, if only for a little while. The sight almost seemed ethereal and so, Dimitri wondered if maybe he was dreaming again.

But it had been ages since he'd had a pleasant night.

“You fainted. I was worried so I took you to your room. Please, you need to rest,” his tone turned kind, “I will stay here if you need it.”

Dimitri vaguely remembered being carried to his room, being held, embraced in his arms while sinking into a weary sleep. His face softened as he looked at Dedue, his heart warm at the memory.

“Thank you, Dedue. I...” He swallowed and looked down. “You have always been there for me. You always take care of me...no matter how small the problem might be.”

“Of course.”

“But...” Dimitri shifted on the bed, so he could face Dedue, his naked feet brushing the cold floor of the room, “you don't have to do it, Dedue. It is not a duty, nor an obligation,” He felt tired, his voice wasn't steady either. It was hard, putting this all into words. He feared the truth behind something he believed to be affection. Something he so desperately wanted.

“You don't owe me anything. It is I the one who is indebted to you. You saved me. You risked your life for mine. And yet, after all that, I threw it into the abyss, wasting it away. It was cruel of me.” Dimitri took a deep breath, his throat dry. He was afraid, that much was true. Still, he knew this had to be done.

“I could not bear it if anything happened to you in...this senseless war. Your life is your own, Dedue. Please do not dedicate it entirely to me. I do not deserve it and...and you are as important as I am. Protect yourself first. Choose a life that will fullfil your heart. You are a person, not my vassal.” Despite the pain he was trying to hide, Dimitri fondly smiled and, after doubting for a moment, he reached for Dedue's hand, warm at the touch, calloused from work and battle. He held it as he spoke. “You are my friend, Dedue. It doesn't matter who I am in this kingdom. You...are very important to me. So...”

“I will not leave.” Dedue had been listening quietly, never letting go of Dimitri's hand. He softly squeezed it, voice hushed into a kind, intimate whisper. Dedue leaned in closer, the faint light of morning bathing in his eyes, clear and wise. Tender words brushing against Dimitri's skin. “I am here with you. Not out of duty. Not out of debt,” a nostalgic smile crossed his face, “at least, not anymore.”

The room fell silent, only their steady breathing flying through the air, heartbeats beating, together, to a similar ryththm.

“I spent a lot of time with my people during these past years. It made me happy. I...learned a lot. But,” Dimitri shivered as Dedue placed a hand on his hair, slowly tucking it behind his ear. There was doubt in the touch, but Dimitri didn't move an inch. “I somehow knew my place was not with them. I wanted to search for you, to find you. I wanted to be by your side and protect you.” He breathed in. “ Not just as a vassal.”

Dimitri closed his eye, heart beating loudly in his chest, wondering if it was okay for him to want this.

“Is it okay?”, he asked. “I want you to be happy. And I...I can't make you happy. I am too broken for that.” Dimitri furrowed his brow, trying to hold back a sob. Dedue sat there for a short while, looking at Dimitri, feeling the hurt, the hatred in his words.

Not daring to open his eye, Dimitri waited. He waited, to wake up, getting back to the reality he deserved, back into a cycle of sleepless nights that would slowly eat up his head. But he remained there, in silence, still feeling the warmth of Dedue's hand over his own.

He heard Dedue move, and then he felt a gentle hand caressing his face. Fingers carefully running through the scar of his right eye, as if the touch could heal the past.

“I am happy.” Dedue suddenly whispered. “To know that you are alive.” The prince opened his eye, locking his gaze with Dedue's. Warmth ran through his body as his heartbeat grew faster, as he started to feel like, maybe, he was alive. “I will fight, so none of us die. So we can live in a world you promised to build, a world where Duscur and Faerghus will be at peace.” He slowly placed his hand on his matted hair, moving some strands away from his face and eye. “I wish to see that new dawn by your side, Dimitri.”

Dedue was now holding both of his hands, with utmost care, just like he'd always tended to the flowers from the greenhouse. Dimitri smiled, his lips trembling and his eyes watery.

There were small, precious things like this that still reminded the prince about a past where, despite the shadows, the skies were clear. Seeing the man he had always cared about, in front of him, he thought that, perhaps, the past hadn't been lost under the debris of the war yet.

#dimidue #fanfic #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #my writing #dimitri blaiddyd #dedue molinaro #oneshot

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joyouslee · 1 month ago

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Snowy Night Timeless Love - thoughts about the ending

Spoilers ahoy!

oh wow they just lined the knives up and started pushing them in at the end, huh? So many missed chances, all the times a slight change would've made all the difference.

A list of specific things that broke my heart:

Xue Ziye putting in the hairpin that Huo Zhanbai gave her, and taking the handwarmer with her as she went on what she knew was a suicidal mission.

Xue Ziye never knowing that Huo Zhanbai forgave her her deception and still wanted to come back to her.

Huo Zhanbai letting Miao Feng pass and not knowing it was her.

Ming Jie (Tong) and Xue Ziye hugging in the cave.

Huo Zhanbai telling his Fifth Brother about the life he wants with Xue Ziye, as Xue Ziye is planning her own death.

She heard his voice and tried to reach out but was too weak.

All of the almosts.

The end credit scene with them watching the aurora borealis made me cry.

I really love Xue Ziye - such an indelible character, and the actress Li Qin did a great job. Her stillness, her tension, her strength, her courage, her kindness, her sharp edges, the rare softness when she's with Huo Zhanbai... just a very well-drawn character. I feel the drama fleshed her out well compared to the novel. (I feel pretty glad that all of my most recent dramas have had fantastic women characters - will have to do a separate post celebrating them.)

I also love Huo Zhanbai - purehearted and selfless, a little snarky. He would love to have the simple family life the Fifth Sword chose, but he takes his duty to protect the weak seriously. My heart aches for him so much. The last few episodes were really just one knife after another into his heart. The reveal about Xu Chonghua was pretty much lost in the other grief, but wow I hated the Pavilion Master for not telling Huo Zhanbai.

The ending was so agonizing to watch - and I knew what was (probably) going to happen since I read the novel. I still had to pause several times to regroup. I'm glad that they allowed the men to scream and grieve openly, without being stoic about it, but it was very painful to watch - I wasn't that affected by the novel because the tone of it was very distanced, but Miao Feng and Huo Zhanbai's grief was very raw. Well done by both actors. Her shifu was much more restrained and stoic, but the pain was very evident. Different ways of grieving but all very affecting.

There were some distinct differences from the novel, in particular the relationship between Huo Zhanbai and his shimei. In the novel he loved her passionately even though she marries his shixiong, and the reason he's so determined to get the medicine for Mu Er is because he loves her. She's a better person in the drama than the novel at the end - she lets HZB go and gives him her blessing. In the novel, when he arrives after Mu Er's death, she blames him for always being too late - too late to stop her from marrying Xu Chonghua, too late to save Mu Er. She goes crazy and he has to take care of her for the rest of her life, and it's implied that she pretends to be crazier so that he'll stay/ take care of her. I prefer the drama, that she gets a little redemption at the end, that she isn't so selfish as in the novel.

In the novel, Huo Zhanbai doesn't even find out about XZY's death until a month later, from the Sword Pavilion Master, another instance where the novel felt so much more emotionally distanced than the drama. (But the novel makes more sense that he would've arrived to her gravestone only, versus in the drama where he's only a day behind them, he should've still arrived while they were laying her out for her funeral, since in Chinese funerary practices the body is kept in the home for several days before burial.)

The drama had a much kinder/gentler ending - Ming Jie (Tong) in the novel signs a truce with Huo Zhanbai/the Sword Pavilion, but it turns out it's only so that he can take that time to restore Yuan Yi Palace and plan for a new attack against them. He never understands the worth of a life, only power.

In the novel Huo Zhanbai also becomes the Sword Pavilion Master - I like that in the drama he chooses instead to be a wanderer to help people in need.

The novel ending was quite bleak. I much prefer the drama where there is at least some hope in all of that tragedy.

My main complaint about the drama would be the villains - mainly the Big Bad and the comic relief. The Big Bad was very one dimensional - evil all the way through, no charisma - I couldn't really see why he commanded such loyalty, other than through fear, which is not really a good method when he sends his people out far away to do things for him. I feel like a lot more people would defect or run away, unless there's something keeping them loyal. All he did was hurt his minions. I would've liked to have seen more nuance, to see why someone like Miao Feng would be so loyal.

(A minor nitpick: until the end, I thought the medicine valley was literally in the same mountains as the Big Bad's lair, because it if it was so far away, how the heck did Miao Feng stop by so often to play weiqi? and how did Miao Shui follow him to find out what he was doing - she would've had to follow him for many days across barren lands.)

The comic relief character Miao Huo was really annoying to me - he was so bumbling and ineffective I couldn't figure out why the Big Bad would even tolerate his existence for so long, let alone why Tong would select him as co-conspirator. If you want us to believe the Big Bad's sect is survival of the fittest only, dog eat dog, then Miao Huo's entire existence undercuts that idea.

Ultimately, I liked the drama a lot, with most of the credit to Li Qin and Zeng Shunxi for delivering on the chemistry and bringing those characters to life.

#snowy night timeless love #七夜雪 #my meta #snowy nights timeless love spoilers

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